Monday, September 1, 2008

Tomorrow is THE day!

Carson is SO excited about starting Kindergarten tomorrow. He actually helped me pack his lunch, pick out his clothes, pack his backpack, and finally get in the bed. Prayers were said, and most often Carson will say his prayers and then ask me what else...meaning what else do I pray about tonight? I asked if he wanted to ask Jesus to help him tomorrow so he wouldn't be afraid at school. He said I won't be afraid...but I will ask him to help you not cry. I said I won't be crying because I am sad.... it would only be because I miss you. He told me that he will come home so I don't miss him too much. I also asked him if he was afraid to ride the bus without Mommy or Daddy? I don't think he realized that we won't be on the bus with him...he looked a little puzzled, but assured me that he will be ok.

I am afraid that he will forget his backpack on the bus...that he won't get off the bus.... that he will get on the wrong bus to come home, that he will get lost at school and not know anyone. All the big scary things that I can think of ....I am. I asked his teacher if I could drive him tomorrow morning instead of letting him ride the bus, and he assured me that I could. But, and here is where I really am letting go... I decided that the first special. All the kids will be at the bus stop and will be anxious and excited.... I want him to be a part of that too. I am going to forgo the pictures in front of his school on the first day of school. So reluctantly...I am putting my five year old on a bus all by himself, I am trusting the teachers and helpers at his school to get him to his classroom and to see that he doesn't forget to put his lunch in his cubby, that he washes his hands after using the bathroom, that he will finally be completely in dependant from me for more than 4 hours.... and I won't be able to just drop by and see how he is doing (at least not for the first two weeks). Then there is the fact that Carson can be Carson and extremely hard headed and can be be challenging and exuberant.... I really want him to excel in school so I am praying that he will be attentive and cooperative with his teacher. I truly hope that he has a great day and that my fears will have been for naught. We welcome any prayers...tomorrow for Carson, that he has a blessed day... and that his Momma doesn't completely lose it and embarrass herself and Carson in the morning.

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